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Posted: April 6, 2020

Selfless Senior Spotlight: Melina Moreno

Meet Melina Moreno of Cibola High School, 2020 Selfless Senior!

“Has there ever been a time where you felt like there was no need for you? Like no one would react if you suddenly disappeared without a trace? That was how I felt this past summer.  My friend group split in half and left all those involved in emotional ruin. Losing your closest friends to a misunderstanding is unbearably unfair. I already lost plenty of friends in my time and it never got easier but for some reason this hurt the most. I ended up feeling exhausted all the time, I felt numb and at times I would imagine what would be everyone’s reaction if I evaporated into thin air. ‘I tried to describe it once: a clock gear. Do I do stuff, day to day? Yeah. But I can always be replaced, or be taken out. I’m not special, and if I were to disappear, I would be forgotten by 99% of people’-Anonymous. However, it was for that one percent I blocked out those thoughts of disappearing. At times I still wake up numb and I feel like a waste of space. It has been hard coming to school where no one notices I’m not okay. I wasn’t myself for four months and no one noticed. When my friend Sammy asked how I was doing I almost cried because someone cared. I’m fully aware my mom, dad, and best friend all love me dearly and care a great deal about me, however hearing ‘are you okay’ in person was truly touching. As the school year went by I grew a stronger connection with the friends I still had and I even managed to somehow get a boyfriend. Things are getting better. I’m not gonna lie and say I’m not sad anymore and I’m living carefree. Healing takes time. At times I still wake up feeling unwanted and numb, but it’s getting better. I know I have people who love me and you should know you have people too. It’s not easy forcing a smile when you want to break down so don’t hide it. Confide in someone, that can be a close friend, family member, teacher, or counselor. Just know someone out there loves you and you were never a waste of time or space.”

How would you describe Melina?