NOTE FROM THE COUNSELOR

 School Wide Positive Behavior Supports (SWPBS)

The following article, Why Anti-bullying Programs Miss the Mark,  is written by Blair Wagner, CPCC, ACC.  It came from A Way Through, an website run by female friendship experts, Jane Balvanz and Blair Wagner.  This website is an excellent source for supporting healthy friendships and relationships in general.  After you read this article, hopefully you will make the connection that here at Mitchell Elementary, the School Wide Positive Behavior Support (SWPBS) approach, that we have adopted, supports exactly what this article states regarding bullying behaviors and social skills.  Our aim at Mitchell is to teach positive, respectful behaviors inside the classroom and outside and to be consistent and clear as to what that looks like.  In this manner, by emphasizing what behaviors are desired and appreciated, we hope to minimize the attention that bullying behavior gets and ultimately, "snuff it out" as much as possible over time.  Our SWPBS efforts are intended to help students truly understand what respectful, positive interaction looks and feels like toward one another as well as toward their families and the school staff, too. 

Why Anti-bullying Programs Miss the Mark

As I direct my focus to a new school year about to begin, I reflect back on the past school year and the approaches I’ve seen schools take to address school bullying among their students and their staff.  The one that really misses the mark is starting an anti-bullying program.

It is common for us to see something we don’t like and to join an anti-[fill in the blank] campaign.  We talk about, write about, and complain about how bad it is.  Our focus is on resisting the thing we don’t like, in this case bullying.  We push against it.  And that’s the problem.

What We Resist Persists

There’s an old saying: What we resist persists. Put another way, when we are negative about an issue, we perpetuate or spread negativity.

When we jump on the anti-bullying bandwagon, our attention, energy and focus are on the negativity of bullying. From this place of negativity, we lack emotional access to positive solutions. The anti name has a persistent negative influence.

As an alternative to a dooms day attitude or an angry approach, a more effective option is to recognize the bullying we see.  Name it.  Be curious about it.  Look at it from several angles.  But don’t stay stuck there.

Once we’ve gotten clear on what we are seeing and where it is coming from, work to clarify what we DO want. We want better social skills, social competence, emotional intelligence, social intelligence, healthy friendships, a positive culture, a positive climate, and positive role models.

A Springboard to Create a Replacement of Bullying Behavior

This positive focus gives us a springboard to create what we want.

Once we know what we want in bullying prevention, our job is to provide structures, training, and ongoing support for our students and for our school staff – all based on a focus of creating what we want, not on stopping what we don’t want.

Let’s replace those anti-bullying posters (of kids bullying or being bullied) with posters representing healthy friendships and acts of kindness. Start social skills training early. Put forth positive examples, language and visuals everywhere to influence your students in a positive way!

POP TABS

We are collecting POP TABS for the Ronald McDonald House again this year.. Please remember to collect those tabs and send them to school with your student. Those tabs can make a significant difference.