Xerxes in Fotoed
Boots
Once upon a time there was a very rich man with three sons. When the man died, the three sons divided up their father's Cu coins, Ag coins, Au coins, his real estate of 300 acres, his grand collection of vintage cars, and his pet cat with no name. The oldest son got all of the Au coins and his father's house, the middle son got all of the Ag coins and his father's cars, but all that the third son, named Taylor, got was the Au coins and the cat with no name.
While Taylor and the cat with no name were walking away from the house, Taylor noticed that the cat was having trouble walking, but soon he found out why. Once out of earshot and sight the cat with no name immediately stood up on his hind legs and asked, "Master, may I have a sack and a pair of Fetoed boots, if you give me these things you'll become the luckiest and richest man in the world." Since Taylor had nothing to lose, and he thought he was dreaming, he gave the cat one burlap sack and a pair of Fetoed boots, Taylor also gave the cat the name Xerxes.
Xerxes thanked his new master, put on the Fetoed boots, and ran of with the sack, to a place he knew would have many rabbits running around in search of food, to start faze one. Once he reached this place he put some carrots in the sack and laid down for a nap. When he awoke there was a plump rabbit struggling to get out of the sacks simple, but effective trap. Xerxes tied up the sack and ran straight for the king's castle. Once in front of the king Xerxes bowed as low as catlly possible and said, "Oh, Sire please accept this plump rabbit as a gift from the Duke of Periodicia." Obviously, the king accepted the rabbit, even though he had never heard of the Duke of Periodicia, which is good, because that is the name to which Xerxes had just made up for his new master.
Over the next few weeks Xerxes returned to the king and each time gave him another wonderful gift. One time Xerxes gave the king a sixty gigabyte iPod, which he had made from excess parts. On another occasion Xerxes brought the king a never before seen gadget that would revolutionize the modern world, which I'm not at liberty to discuss, because of governmental reasons.
After the shower of gifts had subsided, Xerxes was ready to initiate faze two. To do this Xerxes asked Taylor to go on a walk with him. Taylor saw no harm in it so he put on his shoes and set of with his cat by his side. The both of them had a great time laughing and telling jokes, Xerxes was very relaxed, but as soon as he heard the sound of a car he became very tense. After a few minutes, Xerxes ordered Taylor to take of his clothes and jump into the river, thinking that this was another strange dream; he did what he was told. As soon as Taylor had hit the water Xerxes yelled at the top of his lung," Help! Help! The duke is drowning." Then, in no time Taylor was "saved" by the king's bodyguards. When the king saw that Xerxes was standing behind the mysterious drowning man he said, with extreme enthusiasm," Oh you must be the Duke of Periodicia, who has sent me so many lovely gifs, come get this man my best set of spare clothes, he must have been mugged, or something, am I right?"
Looking at Xerxes in total confusion, the Duke said," Yes, they snuck up on me, came out of the river."
"Say," said the king," why don't you ride with me and my daughter, it'll be fun!"
"I don't know-
"None sense, when you're done getting dressed I'll meat you in the car."
"Xerxes what did you do?" demanded Taylor.
"Oh nothing, I'm just doing you a favor."
"Fine, but you're not riding with us."
"Ok, that'll give me time for faze three."
"What!"
"Got to go, bye!" Xerxes said as he ran ahead of the car.
As Taylor got into the car, he was confused about what was going on he almost didn't see how beautiful the princess was. They soon began to talk, and the whole incident was forgotten.
Not everybody was enjoying themselves, though. Xerxes had run ahead, not to get away from Taylor, but to tell all the workers to tell the king that they were working for the Duke of Periodicia, or else the ogre, that they really worked for, would eat them. The workers were so afraid that they would be eaten that they did exactly as they were told.
Once Xerxes reached the castle that he ogre lived in he burst through the doors and marveled at the ugliness of the beast.
Once the ogre realized that there was a cat staring at him he yelled," Why are you looking at me, and why are you in my house?"
In response Xerxes said," Sorry your greatness I just had to see you, can you really turn into a lion?"
"Of course I can," bellowed the gigantic ogre, and with an enormous crack, as if some one had released a first class lever catapult into a wall, the ogre had become a loin.
Xerxes waited for him to turn back, and said," But you can't turn into a mouse that would be impossible."
"Oh yah!" replied the ogre in an annoyed tone," watch this," and with the same crack as before became a mouse, but his time Xerxes pounced on the ogre and ate him in one bite.
It was at that moment that the king and the new, and now true, Duke arrived. With grate haste Xerxes ran to the door ordering the Duke's new servant's to make a marvelous meal, and surprisingly, hey obeyed. There in the new palace of Periodicia, it was decided that the princess would marry the Duke and to other news, brought by Xerxes, it would turn out they would become not just a family but, they would also become King and Queen of Periodicia.
The End
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