The Three Little
Pigs
Once upon another time, there were three small pigs. One pig was named G-ravity, the other E-lectro, and he last M-agnetism. G-ravity was the oldest, while E-lectro and M-agnetism were twins. Now that the twins had completed their education, the pigs needed a place to live. After much deliberating and a bit of water boiling to find elevation, the pigs decided to set up their lives in the country.
The county was a pleasant place for the pigs to live. It was devoid of the nagging college professor; the professor who always told the pigs that they were hard-to-teach pigs, just like G-ravity's favorite person, Albert Einswine. It also was vacant of anything mean, dangerous, or hungry. The pigs loved their home.
"This is wonderful!" said M-agnetism. All of them were surveying the plot of land they found.
"Yes, I absolutely love this place! I like it even better because that horrible professor isn't here," squealed E-lectro.
"Yeah. That professor was bad." The wee hogs stood contemplating the professors last words to each of them: "You poor little piggy, you will end up being as wolf's dinner because you aren't bright. Yep, you are bright as a light bulb hooked up in series to twenty ten-ohm resistors. You will never stop Mr. W. Olf. Yep, that wolf'll eat you right up, if you never show potential. Speaking of potential, that energy exam" The pigs cringed at the very memory of that professor.
E-lectro looked at M-agnetism. "Do you remember that wolf our professor always talked about?"
"Yes. Last I heard Mr. W. Olf was arrested for selling the exact apple that hit Newton on the head. No apple ever hit his head," M-agnetism said.
"Oh. Well that's good that he's gone," said G-ravity. However, that wasn't good. Mr. W. Olf had just finished his jail sentence. Even worse, he was in the forest near the pigs.
"Well, shouldn't we start to make some places to live?" G-ravity was looking around for some supplies. E-lectro found some straw and decided to start making his house. Five minutes later, E-lectro was placing a mat outside of his house when M-agnetism came back with a second-class lever wheelbarrow of sticks.
"I'm done!" yelled E-lectro. His house was finely built, but was sturdy as pile of air. Next, down the road, M-agnetism was stacking sticks to make his house. While all of this was happening, G-ravity was coming back with some bricks.
"Yes! I'm done!" M-agnetism shouted. M-agnetism's house was not much better built than E-lectro's house. He joined E-lectro as they walked around waiting for G-ravity to finish his house.
"Oh, my, this is hard." G-ravity was hoisting up some bricks by using a double pulley. By the time G-ravity was done, his house was strong enough to resist a gust a wind traveling 10 meters per second per second. "Well I'm done, too!" bellowed G-ravity. By the time all three were done building it was late in the day so all of the pigs went to their houses. However, the Mr. W. Olf came out late in the day.
"Yum, yum. Three pigs. What a wonderful dinner," growled Mr. W. Olf. He walked up to E-lectro's house. "Little pig, little pig, let me use your second-class-lever of a door to come in!" Yelled Mr. W. Olf.
E-lectro was quivering in his house. "Not by the hair on my chinny-chin-chin."
Mr. W. Olf huffed and puffed and blew E-lectro's house down with a forceful gust of air.
"Ah!" screamed E-lectro. He ran at a slow speed of .5 meters per second to M-agnetism's house.
"Ha-ha-ha-ha!" Mr. W. Olf howled. He walked over to M-agnetism's house. "Little pigs, little pigs, let me use your second-class-lever of a door to come in!"
Both E-electro and M-agnetism were shaking inside M-agnetism's house. "Not by the hair on our chinny-chin-chins," they both shrieked in unison.
Therefore, Mr. W. Olf huffed and puffed and obliterated M-agnetism's house. The two small boars waddled to G-ravity's house at a speed of .5 meters per second.
In side of G-ravity's house, the three brothers were waiting to see if the house could sustain a ferocious gust of wind.
"Who's hungry?" asked G-ravity. The twins raised their hands. "I'll go put some water on the fire."
Just then the wolf came up to the house.
"Little pigs, little pigs, let me use your second-class-lever of a door to come in!" Mr. W. Olf was waiting outside ready to blow the brick house to oblivion.
"Not by the hair on our chinny-chin-chins!" yelled the pigs.
"Fine I'll huff and I'll puff and blow your house down." The wolf did just that. However, the house didn't crumble. Mr. W. Olf tried again.. Again, nothing happened. He walked away to the sound of the loud little swine rejoicing.
"Good job building your house." E-lectro patted G-ravity on the back.
"Yeah, top-notch work. Because of you, we made the wolf go away!" chimed in M-agnetism.
By now the water in the fireplace was boiling at 94 degrees Celsius.
The wolf was growling to himself. "How could three tiny piglets stump me? I must stop them!" He sat on a rock. "Hmm. I need a idea." Then as if something hit him with a third class lever over the head, he stood up. "I'll go down the chimney!"
The little pigs were all sitting around the fire. Suddenly, the pigs heard a noise.
"It's on the roof!" yelled G-ravity. Then something came sliding down the chimney at 1.5 meters per second per second. The wolf landed right in the 94 degree Celsius water.
Mr. W. Olf shot right up through chimney howling with pain.
The pigs celebrated the wolf and his burning. In addition, the pigs never saw Mr. W. Olf ever again.
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